Dinner [for Essie]

[bachjones]

 The woman at the coffee place had recognized Isaac, and had looked at Bach like he was a kidnapper and murderer all in one wrapping. It had taken his son not only ordering a coffee for Essie, but also knowing precisely how she liked it and a silly anecdote about how Isaac was showing Bach around town because Essie was too busy or some nonsense, to make the woman step away from the phone. They could have just sung. 

It was pretty clear that Isaac had a bit of a clue about what was going on, but he didn't want to talk about it, and Bach didn't really either. So they talked about the things he had learned at school, about the trips they'd make together when Isaac was older, and when Bach would have a guitar again. After all that, he neatly returned his son to his adoptive mother. 

Bach had found a few more of his things at the beach, including his guitar, snares broken but still a chance to live. It hurt to see the instrument like that, but it also gave him hope. He could bounce back. He would. 

He visited Lily Middleton for a shower and a new outfit, protesting any police involvement, he just wanted to go have dinner with his son. Mrs Middleton wasn't amused, but she allowed it. She was a good woman.

Neatly at the time discussed, Bach tried to show up on Essie's door step. "Essie!" Was she really still putting magic up for him? 

 

Comments

[wakingwakewood]

"I know what you mean, sweetie, but Daddy's just gotten back in town, he needs some time to get settled." And once she was sure he wouldn't try to bolt with Isaac, they could arrange some kind of... visitation? Shared custody? God, that sounded so awful, but that was the only option. She wasn't giving Isaac up anytime soon and Bach, despite everything, maybe did deserve another chance.

"Let's give him a week or two to figure things out before we start making plans." Essie hoped that it sounded pleasant enough to keep Bach from going off. With his hair trigger, she just couldn't guess, but she didn't want to set bad expectations for Isaac.

[bachjones]

Jesus, she really was all over the place with the messages she was sending. She was sending him away but telling him to stick around at the same time, and plans? Those could mean everything.

"We can't just up and run, Isaac. You've got school, you've got friends, you've got Da-"

"Run?" Isaac paled. "Not run. No running. You're not going. Nowhere. You stay here. With us? And Dan?" He loaded his fork with pasta, but his hand was shaking. Both hurt and anger, it sounded like. "You're not running."

Fuck. "Maybe we can enjoy dinner first, Isaac. We're not going to have a discussion during pasta and garlic bread, okay? That's not fair for the cook."

[wakingwakewood]

And this was why she wasn't happy. She knew that Isaac would want everyone to be happily ever after. She'd tried to set expectations, but he was a kid, he didn't get things like Mama wanted to punch Daddy in the face most of the time so he couldn't live with them. She'd tried to tell Bach that Isaac had been putting roots down here, that trying to take him and leave would be traumatic.

Did anyone listen to her? Nope.

Essie shifted over until she was kneeling by Isaac's chair, reaching up to rub his back a little. "It's okay, sweetheart. Daddy's not leaving you again, no one's leaving, but he can't stay here. Not right now. But he's not leaving, and you'll see him plenty, okay?" Looking over to Bach, she had a feeling she didn't need to tell him what she thought about him inserting the idea of running with Isaac into the kid's head. Now he could worry about Daddy taking him from Mama AND Daddy just leaving. Lovely.

[bachjones]

Bach was going to leave the explanation to why daddy couldn't stay completely up to her, thank you very much. She couldn't get over things, not him. He had so often rebuild burned bridges that he could make a job out of it.

"You're going to see me so much that you'll be bored of me. Annoyed, even. I'll be everywhere. Up the street, down the street, at school, everywhere. Just -"

"Not here." Isaac stuffed his face, staring daggers at him. Like this was all his fault, but he knew children couldn't understand grown up stuff.

"Not enough room here", he winked. "Good pasta?"

[wakingwakewood]

"Mama, we can make room, right?" Essie tried not to wince when he turned back to her, clearly desperate to find some solution that would keep everyone together. "What about the extra room? Daddy can have the extra room."

Yes, there was an extra room and Essie knew that Isaac was right, but Isaac didn't know that Essie didn't quite trust Bach not to sneak out with Isaac one night. She actually didn't trust him at all. Not after everything that had happened over the last few months. Taking a deep breath, she prepared to be the bad guy. "I'm sorry kiddo, not right now. Let's finish dinner, okay?"

[bachjones]

Great. So much for keeping up the illusion for at least an hour. The pain that Isaac exuded made Bach feel clawing his eyes out, it was so depressing. Instead he just wiped his face and tried to form a smile again.

"Daddy d-"

"Enough, Isaac." Bach looked at him. "There are plenty of times in your life that you will be unable to get what you want. I'm sorry I can't change this for you right now, but this is one of those times. So you can have this here, right now, or pout about something that wasn't going to happen anyway." He leaned in to kiss his head, but the boy ducked away. "Eat your food, let's just have a meal together, okay? Ordinary."

He gave Essie a glance, hoping he wasn't overstepping on the upbringing of his own kid. "I'm here now."

[wakingwakewood]

Essie may have thought Bach's words were a little harsh, but they were true so she didn't contradict him. Instead she gave Isaac a little nudge, "It'll be okay, Daddy and I have some things to work out and that takes time. There aren't any fairy godmothers here, but we both love you and that isn't going away."

She went back to her seat and when she saw Isaac was still pouting, she conceded, "Daddy can stay until bedtime and he can tuck you in. But he has to go after that."

[bachjones]

"F-" Bach swallowed the word just in time, but it took him a few seconds longer to rein in the anger accompanying it. Really? Did she have to control everything? He was allowed to tuck in his own son? Wow, thanks.

Isaac growled, by the look of it surprising himself as well, and Bach put a hand on his head. "I'm sorry about that, kid. Made my song just real ugly there for a second, didn't I? Hurt your ears? I'll try to never do it again. Let the anger seep into the floor or something, just enjoy your food. The food's good, Essie. Well done."

[wakingwakewood]

It was her house, why was he surprised she was setting the rules. He was the one that had to earn a little trust here. Her house, her rules. She fiddled with the charm at her wrist and shifted in her chair. She hated the look on Isaac's face, he'd been so excited and now he was completely unsettled. She had a feeling that the nightmares might return tonight, and made a note to leave her door open so he could wander in and cuddle if he needed it.

"Thanks." She didn't know what else to say. "I can show you how to make it, if you want, it's pretty easy."

[bachjones]

"You're going to teach me how to cook something?" What the fuck was going on with this yoyo of mixed messages. Had Bach been such a shit that he deserved to be pulled along like this?

He laughed. "I can barely use a microwave without it going up in flames. The only reason we've been eating healthy was because there's nothing to heat in a salad and everybody got fed up with sandwiches."

Isaac nodded softly.

"And I wasn't going to get take out every day either, that's expensive no matter how you do it." And even though Isaac had made things easier to get stuff free, Bach didn't want to give him that example.
He scratched the back of his neck. "So if you want to take on all that, yeah, sure. Is it a cheap meal to make?"

[wakingwakewood]

"You can't be that bad at cooking. and how do you set a microwave on fire, anyway?" Granted, she'd set fire to a few things she she was learning how to control her magic, but that was years and years ago. How hard could it be to boil some pasta?

"And yeah, it's pretty cheap, you can use canned goods for most of it if you want. Add a couple fresh things to brighten it." She was actually pretty proud of her cooking skills. After moving here, she wasn't sure how she'd do, but she'd picked up more in her travels than she'd realized, especially from her time in Italy.

[bachjones]

"Can I help?" Isaac was thawing towards the both of them again.

"Help by really enjoying this dinner so you can tell me in all the ways I'm doing it wrong", Bach replied. "You know you're not safe in a kitchen with me. Remember the poptart things?" After that one breakfast here, he had talked his way into a package of the things, only to make Mrs Gordon's toaster short circuit.

"It's a Siren thing. The matriarch has someone cook for her. Maybe we're too close to water to be okay around heat and fire. Or we just suck in kitchens.
I think the microwave was with something plastic that caught? Or the eggs, I can't remember."

[wakingwakewood]

Essie had to grin as she looked over at Isaac? "Is that why you make yourself scarce every time I make dinner? I thought it was just because you didn't want to have to help." Reaching over, she ruffled his hair a little as he sheepishly hid his face behind a bite of garlic bread. Little sneak, she was actually impressed. He probably didn't want her to worry or blame him (not that she would, not EVER), so he just took to his room or the living room or outside with Dan until she called him.

"You know, I might be able to work up a kind of charm for that. Come kind of barrier. I'm great at those." He may have noticed when he tried to find her home when she didn't want him to.

[bachjones]

"Yeah, great, awesome. I'll call you in for adding it as soon as I have a kitchen again." Or a place to live, but Isaac didn't have to hear that.

"Just to be sure", Isaac murmured at the same time in answer to Essie, the tips of his ears red. "Daddy says I need to find someone to cook for me."

That probably was going to land well. "And now you did!" He finished his bowl and tore off another piece of bread. "Much quicker than I managed, kid. Well done. My mother just got me good food when a show was coming up, took me until my teens to get what I want all the time."
That probably wasn't going to land well either. "Is there more pasta?"

[wakingwakewood]

A raised eyebrow was all Bach got. She knew his childhood had been rough, had to be for him to be such an asshole now, but that was new information. And probably not information Isaac needed to hear. He'd probably have questions later, the kid never forgot anything, he'd just let things stew until he could ask. "I'm more than happy to do it. And I can make some easy things, cold pastas, cold pizzas, some other things that you can take." When he had a place and she was almost certain he didn't yet.

"Help yourself." She pushed the casserole dish towards Bach and made a mental note to pack whatever was left for him to take. Christ, and he thought he'd just be able to take Isaac with nothing. It would have been borderline abuse.

[bachjones]

"So I can eat cold pizzas and cold pastas for the rest of the week?" Bach would take it, though. He'd take anything that would mean he wouldn't had to spend money. "Isaac's going to be so jealous of me."

"Am not."

Cheeky bugger. How the hell could Bach have come up with the idea of a life without him? The kid was perfect, and it was a mystery where that came from. He accepted the dish and filled his bow again, chewing on a piece of bread. "How's the food, Isaac? You think you're up for becoming a food reviewer? Because you know I'm going to have to try this if I get it offered." Especially with it coming from Essie. Why the hell did she still have so much control over him?

[wakingwakewood]

"That's a thing?"

"Essie found herself nodding, "You bet it's a thing. People go to places to eat for an actual living. I met one when I was... where was I? France somewhere, I think. On the coast. He knew where the restaurant got all of its food, where the chef had trained, everything. It was fun to eat with him, he had a ton of stories about places he'd been."

Isaac looked a bit suspicious. "True story. I can show you some reviews on the computer later."

[bachjones]

'France somewhere'. Of course, because Essie had the money to travel for fun, for whatever she felt like. It wasn't like Bach for a couple of minutes had forgotten that she could buy his entire life and still have pockets full of cash left. He wouldn't bring it up though, wouldn't show Isaac there was such a huge gap between his father and his m- parental figure. He was pretty sure that at the least Essie wasn't spoiling him.

"She is telling the truth, Isaac. Usually they work for newspapers or other kinds of media, but some can just do it for writing books and stuff." Or however it worked.

"But you don't have to become one if you don't want to, of course."

Isaac's suspicion turned into a frown. "Who's buying his dinner all the time?"

"Hey, I don't know that much about food reviewing. But if it's for a newspaper, it's them. I think. Just like with all kind of reviews. You know we're the ordinary people, man. We pay for our food, always." Usually.

[wakingwakewood]

They were far from ordinary, but she wasn't going to rock that boat. She also wasn't going to pretend to be something she wasn't to make Bach feel better. Yes, she had traveled the world on her dime with plenty left over, and yeah, part of her felt that made her a better guardian for Isaac than Bach. At least until he got some kind of regular cash flow. But again, none of that was for tonight.

"Speaking of food, eat up, there's some custard and berries for dessert. But only if you finish your pasta and salad, okay?"

[bachjones]

"Salad?" Isaac sighed with all the drama he could muster in his little body. "I already had salad."

"I'll fi- you almost got me there, guy." Bach pointed at the little bowl left to his plate. "Come on now, I know you've had enough salads with me to grow green fingers, but it's something Essie made and we don't -"

"let food waste", his son finished grumbling. But at least he still remembered, right? How much of his time with Bach was still shared, still fresh in his mind? Did he even view him as his father?

"Or if dessert doesn't sound very exciting.." Which it didn't, in his opinion. "Just don't finish it. I'll finish it for you, I don't have to eat the next three days now."

[wakingwakewood]

The rest of the evening passed as awkwardly as Essie imagined it would. She'd make a comment, wince, he'd reply, wince, repeat. But they managed to keep any open hostility off the proverbial table until after dinner, when Isaac took Bach to show him his room and Essie was left to do the dishes. It gave her time to breathe, time to hope that the evening would stay civil. It helped having half a house between her and Bach.

True to her word, she packed the leftovers up and did the dishes, only calling up once to remind Isaac that it was close to bedtime. She'd let Bach help him if he needed it. Then she just had to wait until it was actually time to tuck him in. God help her, she needed that to go smoothly because she was pretty sure it was going to get ugly when it was just the two of them again.

[bachjones]

Bach was surprised Essie allowed him to be alone with his son, to be honest. What if he'd throw him out of the window and run away from him? She probably had magic for that.

Not that it had gone completely horrible, had it? They hadn't fought in front of Isaac, and it sounded like she wasn't very angry at him either. Just confused, which was ..understandable with the mess Bach always brought in.

"Sing? We can ..sing together?" Isaac offered him a book. "I like this one. Please."
"I don't know, kid. Maybe Essie doesn't feel like singing. I don't want her to feel lef- I can just read it for you?"
Not good enough for his son. With surprising volume, he yelled for her. "I'm going to sleep now!"

[wakingwakewood]

She heard him all the way from the kitchen and she couldn't stop laughing until she got to his bedroom. Leaning in the doorway, she crossed her arms. "Are you? I don't remember reading you a story or singing you a lullaby. And I'm positive I haven't had a hug yet. So you can't be going to sleep."

With Dan behind her, she came in and sat next to him on the bed like it was any other night. Even if it wasn't. "What do we have tonight? A book?"

[bachjones]

The pain in his chest was sudden and absolute. But man, just look at that smile on her face, look at Isaac unfurling and sticking his arms out like she could fit in there. Well, one of them could. This was never going to work out, was it? They'd be the frustrated divorced couple, only without the divorce. "This fu-"

"A book", Isaac replied, maybe louder than necessary. "Dan's favorite. And I like it as well. A lot. And you read better. But daddy sings better", he added with a glance at Bach.

Yeah, thanks kid. That's probably the reason why you exist. Nothing of this daddy loves mommy a lot nonsense, Bach just forgot about the condom because there was easy sex. He rubbed his face. His brain was fucking stupid sometimes. "Good thing both things are good talents", he tried instead, keeping the frustration out of his voice. "Can I listen to Essie reading as well?"

"Yes!" Isaac looked at her, putting his hands on the book again. "Of course?"

[wakingwakewood]

"Okay, story time and then hugs and bed. Scoot over." Just like she did every night, she sat on the bed next to Isaac and let him snuggle into her arms so he could see the pictures. She didn't want to think about what Bach made of that, this wasn't his ritual, it was theirs. It started when he needed her to hold him until he went to sleep so he wouldn't worry that she was going to leave him. Then it was just the thing they did.

Opening the book, she started to read the story, bad voices and all. It was about a little seal that lost his favorite rock and everything ended with a big happy ending. From an adult standpoint, it was kinda boring, but it was filled with beautiful drawings of the sea and sea life and that was why she'd picked it up.